I Am in Misery


The pathetic in me wants to come out in 5… 4… 3… 2… Tada! This is my pathetic self coming out through this post. I am just trying so hard to hold it in I guess.

I never asked for what I am going through now but I understand completely that I’m just pretending to be fine when I know, deep inside my heart of hearts, I am not.
I am lost.

I don’t know where to go. I thought that this lost phase is over but apparently it is not. I will be brave to say that I left a big part of me somewhere else. (in Mandaluyong perhaps :p but the biggest part of me is still here. Angry. *wink wink*)

When I go through something like this, my bestfriend is my iPod. It feels like the songs explain what I feel.
This afternoon, I found myself crying while listening to Gary V’s song " Di Na Natuto". I don’t know why. Or maybe I know why but I do not want to tell. I am still scared. So afraid. (Or maybe because I was reminded of Toni Gonzaga in My Amnesia Girl 😉

Ewan. Di ko na alam. I don’t want to be hurting anymore. I don’t like this feeling. (well who does?)

I refuse to be woeful. Can someone save me?


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